I have been reading of the disquiet felt by many at recent developments on the Supreme Court, and in other places. It seems that however logical we think our arguments are, that there is a constituency here in the United States that either defies logic or shows us that we are wrong.
I’d be prepared to believe that my life-long views on politics and society are wrong if I could see that despite my views, things were improving for the majority, but that isn’t the case.
I’m an immigrant.
I arrived on these shores in 2005 after a brief first visit the previous year. I met and married a Republican. She was the first American voter I persuaded to change her affiliation, but she wasn’t the last. However optimistic Rachel Maddow might be, my wife loves her.
Before I lived here I had a comfortable life. I had good jobs, earned decent money and was surrounded by a large and loving family. My old home is still available to me, although returning and starting over at my age wouldn’t be easy. Here is the US we struggle. My wife is a High School teacher, I work as a Paraprofessional, currently in an Elementary School. Both of our jobs are hard work, and neither pays much. Both of us feel that we are making a difference. We struggle more than most, less than some. We own a modest home and have a few hobbies. We pay taxes willingly and she votes because she can, and I can’t.
A couple of weeks ago my Dad died, so in a few days I am flying to England to his funeral. We can’t afford for me to do that, but we will make it work because that’s what you do. That brings me to an important point. We do what we have to do. Everyone does. We might be concerned about SCOTUS appointments, lack of educational opportunities for our kids, roads and bridges, rampant corruption …. and all the rest of it, but along with everyone else we simply do what we do to make today a good day, and tomorrow a better one.
I have been politically active almost all of my life, but my opportunities to get involved here are severely limited. I can’t vote. I should be able to vote. I have been here a long time and pay taxes. I am married to an American and have raised three US citizen children. I contribute and I have chosen this place as my home. On the other hand I see very powerful people trying to disenfranchise many American citizens, so I guess that getting around to allowing me to vote is going to take a while.
I am a Lawful Permanent Resident. I have to renew that status every ten years until I leave, or die. An indiscretion twenty-five years ago means that under the current rules I will never be allowed to be a citizen.
This has implications. It means that when I return from the UK in a few weeks I will be sent for "secondary screening". It happens every time and it means I will probably miss my connecting flight back to Tulsa after they inevitably admit me because they always do. It also means that I cannot join demonstrations or protests of any kind. I cannot engage in any form of civil disobedience or work directly for any campaign. If I do any of those things I will inevitably find myself in the wrong place at the wrong time, and be arrested. If that happens I can kiss my Green Card goodbye.
With all of that ... I am staying.
I have a choice and I'm choosing. I am mindful that most of the 330 million people here do not have that choice. Americans are fond of believing that their "exceptionalism" makes them welcome anywhere. I mean, why wouldn't others want us, we are AMERICANS. The truth is that they are living in a world of their own populated by a rest of the world fueled on their own imaginations.
There are very few places Americans can go because guess what ... other countries have immigration laws too. There are some places that wealthy, or at least very comfortable Americans can go, but only a few and it can be problematic. So most will have to stay however bad it gets.
I am staying. This is my home even if the beaurocracy only appears to tolerate my presence. I am staying because my immediate family is here. I am staying because I have grown to love this land and I think it worth fighting for.
I am staying because you have to stay, and I will remain, and do the little I can do to help, until I die or until I am no longer welcome, whichever comes first.
I am staying for you too, so I hope you can find it in yourself to stay and fight for me, or at least for yourselves.
I think things will get a lot worse before there is a chance of them getting better. I am not optimistic about seeing real progress in my lifetime. I haven’t lost hope, or the will to fight, but I’d prefer not to read too much about those who have … if ya don’t mind.